Chapter 10. Three Words

s5_chapter10_cover

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_1

For three weeks, everything was quiet.  I continued to sift through anything Connor brought me, looking for connections and for the one bit of information that would make everything else fall into place.  Nick and Sean quietly handled other cases and I did searches or a few odd interviews, but nothing substantial.

I hadn’t asked Nick about the status of the inquiry into Donald Price, but I really didn’t have to because he was updating me every day with things he’d done to investigate the man.  Ever since our confrontation, he had been working hard to further the case-but he hadn’t been able to learn anything yet.  He almost never smiled anymore, and everyone avoided asking him for things because they weren’t sure they would like the answer.
*

*

*

s5_chapter10_2

As troubling as Nick’s mood was, it wasn’t nearly as worrisome to me as Sean’s had been since the confrontation.  Sean was not normally quiet or withdrawn, but he was now.  He hadn’t spent the night at my house or had me over to his in two weeks.  We still saw each other every day and we still tore the sheets up most nights, but he always had a reason to leave.

At least I had something to talk about with my therapist now.

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_3

“So how are things?”

“I’m worried about Sean.  Ever since he walked in on Nick hugging me, he has been a little distant.  He hasn’t been spending the night and he’s quieter.”

“You think he suspects something between you and Nick?”

“That seems to be the most logical connection to make-he wasn’t acting this way before.”

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_4

“Then it sounds like we need to talk more about Nick.”

I had been dreading this.  He’d let me gloss over the whole incident at our last session two weeks ago-but at that time, Sean’s behavior wasn’t quite as different.

He waited for me to say something, and when I didn’t he gave me a small smile.

“Are you attracted to him?”

I hesitated, but I knew that the only way to get any help in therapy was to be completely honest.

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_4half

“Yes.”

“To the point that you think you might be tempted if Nick showed an interest in you?”

“No.  Absolutely not.  Nick is attractive and smart, and I admire him, but Sean….Sean fills my head.  I still go weak in the knees when I hear his voice.  I….I’m in love with Sean.”  For some reason, I could say it here.

“Why do you think Sean would be jealous of Nick?”

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_5

“The only thing that comes to mind is that when Sean and I first met, I had an…interest…in Nick.  A crush.  Sean picked up on it.  I was attracted to Sean then, too-both Sean and Nick are very attractive and interesting men–but between the two, Sean wasn’t the one I could see myself with, at first.”

“Why is that?”

“Sean was so….adventurous.  Bold.  Not like me at all.  He was also a flirt and I just thought he wasn’t someone who had any interest in a serious, monogamous relationship.  I felt like a dowdy, boring person next to him, and I was surprised when he made his feelings known.  Nick seemed more stable and similar to me.  Plus, Nick seemed to want me around, but in the beginning Sean objected to my involvement in the cases.”

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_6

“Do you think Sean is in love with you?”

I considered the question carefully before answering.  “Yes.  He actually told me he loved me, but I’m not sure whether it was an accident or habit because he was saying goodbye to me over the phone.  But I think he is in love with me.”

He was quiet for a few moments, then he said, “Ed, you know you can’t control what Sean does or what he thinks.  But you can control what you do and how you react.  What do you think you can do to reassure him that you love him, that you want to be with him?”
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_7

“I…I can tell him that I’m in love with him.  And I can tell him that the way he has been acting is worrying me.  But what if it doesn’t help anything?”

“Then at least you know that you did what you could, and if it doesn’t work out, it isn’t because you didn’t try.”
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_8

That night, after my shift at Rocca Investigations, I told Sean that I wanted to talk to him and asked him to come over.

“I actually wanted to talk to you, too.”

I didn’t like the sound of that.

“Why…why don’t you go first?” It felt like my sternum had a crank that was being tightened, and I crossed my arms to ease the ache.

He shifted back and forth on his feet a few times, and I waited for him to speak.
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_9

“Eddie…I’m in love with you.”

I felt the awful constriction in my chest lift and change-now my heart was beating quickly and I was relieved.  I had to tell him.  I had to tell him now.

“I’m in love with you too.” I threw my arms around him and kissed him, but noticed he wasn’t smiling.  He was barely reacting to my kiss or hug.  “That’s a good thing, right?”  We’ll be fine, right?
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_10

“It…it both is and isn’t a good thing.” He gently removed my hands from him and set me away so that we weren’t touching.  “Eddie, this is my pattern-I fall too hard, too fast.  I mean, I’m already thinking about how I’m…” he closed his eyes so tightly that it caused creases at the corners “I’m already thinking about how I will propose to you.”

I stared at him and tried to gouge my stunned mind into making an appropriate response, but I had nothing.  Luckily, he did not seem to require a response.

“This is what I do.  I did it with Paige and when it didn’t work out, it was clear that I had moved way too fast.  I’ve never been more hurt, and…. and if that happened with us, I’m not sure I could ever really recover.  So I need…. I need a break.”
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_11

I felt numb.  My chest wasn’t feeling constricted, but my heart was thudding so hard that I felt like the vibrations must be visible.

“A break.”

“Yes.”

“You are in love with me, and you want to take a break.”

“I have to.  I have to.”
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_12

“That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard.  Sean, why are you doing this?  Is it…is it that stupid hug thing with Nick?  We were just hugging-he had snapped at me, and -“

“If that had anything to do with it, it is only that it reminded me of what happened with Paige, and it made me realize that if I don’t slow it down and put it all in perspective, I’m going to be destroyed if…if you ever…”

I had voiced those same fears to Belinda and Kendra over drinks one night long ago, and at that time I would never have thought that it would turn out Sean was the one who would let that fear corrode all that what we’d built.  My own words, coming out of his mouth.

*

*

*s5_chapter10_13

“You think I would do that to you?  That I’m so…fickle?”

“I don’t think you would ever set out to do it, but you and I both know that when we first met, you were hot for Nick and -“

“Sean, you can’t hold a stupid crush against me when I didn’t really know you yet or-“
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_14

“Please let me finish Eddie.  All along, I was pushing you to be with me.  I was trying to turn your head from Nick-I pushed and pushed and I wore you down.  I urged you to take one step, and then the next-and maybe you weren’t taking those initial steps for a reason.  Maybe you weren’t ready to commit to me.”
*

*

*
s5_chapter10_15

“So now I don’t know my own mind? Now I can’t be trusted to make decisions?  This is the most ludicrous and shitty excuse for a break-up that I’ve ever heard.  You know what, if you are getting cold feet about our relationship and where you think it is going, then be a man and admit it-but don’t you dare characterize it as something you are doing for my own good.”

“Honey, my feet aren’t cold enough and that is the problem.”

“Bullshit.  This is such bullshit.  How is this…this ‘break’ even supposed to work?  We work together-do you expect me to give up my work at Rocca Investigations? Because I won’t.”

“No, of course not.  I’ve been making some arrangements.  I’m taking a leave of absence from Rocca Investigations.”

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_16

Inside, it felt like I’d swallowed hot coals and they were burning through my stomach.  I couldn’t believe this was happening.  For some reason I hadn’t believed he was going through with it until he showed that he had made arrangements for us not to be together.

“Where will you go?” My voice was gravelly because my throat was trying to close.

“Some of my old Interpol connections have been asking me to come back and do some work for them, so I’m going to work some cases overseas.”

“How long will you be gone?”

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_17

“I’m not sure.  I…I don’t know how long something like this will take.  I’ve never done anything like this before.”

I felt tears coming, but I refused to let them fall.

“If you leave, I’m not going to pine for you.  I’m not going to wait for you.  I’ve been waiting for my brother to come back for years, and he’s the only man I will wait for.”

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_18

“I know.  I would never expect you to wait for me.  I won’t blame you in the least if you…become…involved with someone else.  Even if it is Nick.  I won’t blame him either.  You can explore your options.  Without me being in the way.”

“I see.  Should I get a big, pretty bow for you to put on me before you leave me on Nick’s doorstep?”

“Eddie, it’s not like that.  I don’t want you with Nick-but even more than that, I don’t want you with me just because I drug you along and caught you up in some whirlwind and you find that you ended up somewhere you really didn’t want to be.  I have to protect myself, too-I need to be more careful.”  His eyes were shimmering with tears and I had to look away.

*

*

*

s5_chapter10_19

“I think you should leave, now.” It was taking everything I had to keep from sobbing in the middle of the floor, and I needed him gone.

“Ok.  I love you, Eddie.” He walked out the door.

“Whatever.”  I slammed the door in his face.

*

*

*

Authorial Interjection: I’m sorry.  I know a lot of readers aren’t going to like this, and it was painful for me as well–but this is an important catalyst, I swear.  I both feared and loved writing this because of where it will take the story–and it might not be where you automatically think.  It can be hard, sometimes, to trust the storyteller, and I’m asking you lovely readers to trust me now. 

47 thoughts on “Chapter 10. Three Words

    • Eva: Thank you! I’m so glad you like the story, even though it has taken a turn that some will not like.. :) Thank you for reading and commenting.

      • I think this break up makes the story much more interesting ;)
        And if I would have to choose between Sean and Nick I would definitely pick up Nick so I really like this outcome.
        I can’t wait to read next chapter!

      • Eva: I’m glad you think the story is more interesting. Just because Sean asked Ed for a break doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll end up with Nick, though. ;)

        Thanks for reading and commenting.

  1. Well, I must admit I was fearing the worst, so this came as a relief. I get why Sean said that, and I get why Ed wasn’t happy with decision. I actually just wrote a scene like this (except they mutually agreed to take a break) just to see how it would affect a future story I’m thinking of writing. Every result was cheesy. *facepalm*
    I have confidence in you to not write a story plot-line though and excited, but sad… less Sean? b-b-b-b-ut the pictures of him pouting *gasps for air*
    And poor Nick he’s all caught up in this and he doesn’t mean to do harm and he’s really just a good guy… :/ Oh dear

    • Natty: Ed is definitely not happy with the decision. She’s pretty much stunned, I think. I will do my utmost to keep the result from being cheesy. :)

      Thank you for reading and commenting! :)

  2. And the plot thickens…..

    Response to Sean:
    Ok, I understand the proverb about “if you love something, let it go,” but this is ridiculous! Sean, you really thing going OVERSEAS is going to fix your problem? Couldn’t you have just been honest with Ed about what you were feeling and allowed her a say in the relationship too? Dude…really….

    Another excellent chapter…not my favorite part of the story, but you have to have the occasional conflict. I can’t help but wonder what Nick thinks of all this. Does Sean know something about Nick’s attraction (or lack thereof) to Ed? I would imagine Nick’s sullen demeanor has as much to do with Sean leaving as it does with his breakup and loss of case connections. I can’t wait to see how this turns out! I wish the next chapter(s) were up already so I could fast forward to how this turns out! :-)

    • Jules: It turns out that Sean was more vulnerable than anyone counted on, especially Ed. He honestly thinks this is the best way for all involved, but in Ed’s mind he is definitely wrong.

      I think Sean suspects that Nick is attracted to Ed–but his history with a best friend who betrayed him in this way may have more to do with that suspicion than any actual feelings on Nick’s part.

      I’m glad you like the chapter, in spite of the turn in their relationship. Thank you so much for reading and commenting! :)

    • Starrsim: Ed has come a long way, and she’s infuriated that he’s done this to their relationship. She isn’t going to allow him to paint the situation as something she definitely believes it isn’t. :)

      Thank you for reading and commenting!

  3. NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! How could this happen??? I know you said we have to trust you, but all I can hope is that Ed doesn’t do anything reckless like have rebound sex with Nick.

    • Beachbear: Ed is in a fairly volatile mood….it could go either way–make Sean pay by confirming his fears or go in an entirely opposite direction to prove that he’s wrong. I can’t speculate on any result at this time…..

      Thank you for reading and commenting! :)

      • Olivia: It’s surprising that you were only just now starting to like Sean! Most readers loved him pretty early on. :) Very interesting.

  4. EEP! The next chapter is up! Really Rachel? Now? Right when I was finally stopping my laziness to clear my game of bad CC? Really? Well, bad CC can wait! I’m reading!

    *****

    Alright… All read… I am just going to point out that your ‘Authorial Interjection’ was dead on. I am NOT happy about this. But that hug last chapter was just begging for this to happen. *sigh* I don’t like this…
    Poor Sean! You didn’t force Ed’s hand! Infant, she forced yours with that birthday suit a couple chapters back! That hug was a FRIENDLY hug! No Sean! Don’t goooooooo! :(
    And poor Eddie! She’s probably beating herself up over this! Don’t move on, Ed, wait for him! Wait for Sean! Prove your loyal! Waaaaaait for hiiiiiim! :(
    And I just love how Ed visited the therapist to get how she feels about the situation out in the open (and get us up to date with how Sean been acting).
    And lastly, beautiful pictures and writing (as usual) Rachel. Though I expect Sean and Ed back together; stat! I need to see them together, happy and relationship-healed. Can’t wait for the next chapter!

    • Sammi113: I knew many readers would not like this direction and I’m counting on it–it’s better for readers to have feelings one way or the other than for them to be all “Meh, who cares what happens to her”. :)

      Sean is definitely recasting history in a way to suit his vision of things–he’s forgetting the times that Ed initiated things, or even the fact that he very consciously gave her most of the control in the relationship. He’s not thinking clearly.

      I’m not sure that Ed will beat herself up over this too much–she doesn’t feel like she’s done anything wrong, and she’d likely say that there was nothing she could have done any differently to prevent this from happening (at least, she’d say that at this moment–she’s really angry).

      I tried to think of how to convey what was going on without having a lot of flashbacks and then I remembered that Ed hadn’t been to her therapist in a while and she’d definitely cover this situation. :)

      Thank you so much for reading and for taking the time to comment! :)

  5. I trust you…but I’m still super-sad for Ed and Sean here. Mostly Ed, I think. She’d gone in there to finally lay it all out on the table and confess her true feelings for Sean and then he tells her wants a break. :(

    But then, I know it probably wasn’t easy for Sean either, especially seeing Ed’s reaction was probably worse than he was hoping for. Awwww.

    I actually have no clue where you’re going with this but I am looking forward to finding out.

    • Carla: This is definitely a dark time for both Ed and Sean. You hit the nail on the head with her feelings about this–she is focusing on what she did to get to this point and how much she had to trust him only to have it crumble around her anyway.

      Sean is not having an easy time of it at all. He thinks this is the only way to guarantee that Ed will know she wants to be with him and to give him a little distance so he can slow it down. We’ll hear him explain it again at least once more….

      Thank you for reading and commenting!

  6. Poor Ed, I feel bad for her. Even though Sean said he was taking a break it seemed like Sean was breaking up with her, heck, I felt like I was Ed at the end, poor Ed!

    • Olivia: Ed is furious about this, and her reaction was not quite what Sean expected, I think. Thank you for reading and commenting!

      • Now that I read it over, Nick hugging Ed and Sean seeing it might have made him want to take “the break”

      • Olivia: That is certainly one reason, but not the only one. Thank you for reading and commenting!

      • Yeah that last breakup Sean had must have hurt him pretty bad to breakup with his current girlfriend, so the other reason must have been the last relationship he was in

    • Leslie Gibson: Thank you! I think this situation will resonate with a lot of readers–though they won’t like it. :) Thank you for reading and commenting!

  7. I trust you!!! ^-^ Maybe because I’ve lived this sort of thing…both from Eddie’s perspective and Sean’s. So I…really empathize with both of them right now. *hugs to them!* It’s a sucky thing to go through…but it’s very…human. As pained as I was reading it, I was also laughing sadly at how very real it is and that to me, just shows how great of a writer you are. :D

    It’s believable and I love that in a story.

    • Happyberrypink: Aww, I’m so glad you trust me, and I hate that anyone has to go through something like their situation. It will be very hard for both of them, and since this story is narrated from Ed’s point of view, we probably won’t hear as much about how Sean will cope. I’m delighted that you find this believable. Thank you so much for reading and commenting!

  8. I have been reading your story for quite a while but I don’t believe I ever commented. I can not believe Sean would actually do that to poor Edith, but I’m interested in what will happen next.

    • Tiff: Perhaps it is easy to underestimate the impact that Sean’s last relationship had on him, because it has really only been mentioned once before. Given the point of view the story is written from, we know what is in Ed’s head (well–what she’ll admit in her head), but the only access we have to Sean is through Ed’s perspective. We don’t know what is in his head unless he tells us, and we weren’t around when his last break-up was fresh.

      Thank you for reading and commenting! :)

  9. Frigging IDIOT! There, now that’s out of the way, I don’t know which one them I’m talking about either, him because of his irrational logic based on old wounds or her because she isn’t fighting to keep him. I get that he’s scared, love can do that to you, he’s feeling too much and he’s terrified that he’ll ruin it so now he’s running away instead because that’s what his past has taught him. And Eddie is holding on way too hard to her own emotions, keeping them locked in and bottled up even when she needs to let it all out to keep the best thing in her life. I did say I have a Nick and Eddie shipping going, but right now, no, not a chance, I want her wth Sean… sweet, stupid Sean. :-( Loved this chapter, I didn’t see this coming and it certainly is a catalyst for some interesting turns in the story.

    • Willow Weeds: LOL! I think Ed is a little stunned still, at this point. She agrees with you wholeheartedly that he’s being an idiot. But it does seem like she’s just shutting down. She feared he’d end up leaving her before it ever really began, and now that it’s happened she’s probably thinking, “Told you so” to herself. She just never thought that he’d be leaving for the reasons that he’s leaving–that is what she can’t get her head around.

      Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment. :)

  10. Hi Rachel,

    I recently started playing the Sims 3 again after a couple year break. I remembered your Ed Prescott story and so I came back and caught up reading. I just wanted to say that I still love it! Also, congrats on your daughter! I would love to be able to write a story that is as engaging as yours. I have an idea, but don’t have the computer to handle it (or the time – there is never enough time). :) Someday…although by that time the Sims 4 might be out lol.

    Regarding this particular entry, can we all take a moment to yell at Sean? Even if Sean is scared, communication is so important for a relationship. On the upside, this will allow you to look into the Ed/Nick “relationship” more. ;) Even if it’s not romantic, I am sure that it will still develop. Awesome job!

    • Juleski: Hi! Welcome back to the land of simming! :) I’m so glad you still enjoy my story, and thank you for the congratulations on my little girl–she’s a handful, but precious. I know what you mean about having the time–there simply aren’t enough hours in the day.

      Feel free to yell at Sean–I know many of my readers would love to do that. I’m glad you are looking forward to any developments that might occur in Nick and Ed’s relationship. Thank you for coming back and reading and taking the time to comment!

  11. Wow! This seems a little late to comment since this entry was posted on July 6th but I re-read all of the stories. Yes, I have spent a whole week reading all of the Edith Prescott mysteries. Time consuming but totally worth it! Last time I read your stories I only got up to half way through story 3 where it had finished so I was glad to see more entries when I discovered your blog again. If only I could write a story as engrossing as this!

    I would like to see Ed and Nick get together but I think something unexpected will happen. When will the next chapter be up because I’m itching to find out what happens next?

    Keep up the brilliant work! :)

    • Chloe: I’m glad you are enjoying the story. :) I’m hoping to get the next chapter up within the week. I think I have all the pictures, and the chapter itself is already written. Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. :)

    • Daisy: Thank you! I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story–I hope to get the next up soon, but family visited unexpectedly and we’ve been too busy with them for me to post. Thank you for reading and commenting! :)

  12. Oh my, how did I miss this one!?

    Say what!?! Sean, what are you doing? You need a firm slap upside the head.

    “That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard.” LOL I’m gonna give it to Ed there. I love her reaction to this, her strength and fortitude. Good girl. This line gave me chills: “If you leave, I’m not going to pine for you. I’m not going to wait for you. I’ve been waiting for my brother to come back for years, and he’s the only man I will wait for.” I can only hope I’d be as strong if I was being run over with a truck like she is.

    Okay, initial reactions aside, I suppose he’s gotta do what he’s gotta do though. I do see how he’s thinking here, even if I don’t think he needs to be thinking that way. I’m very interested to see what becomes of these two after this. I trust that fate (i.e. their author) will take them where they’re meant to be, wherever that is! <3

    (Am I bad for hoping she does have rebound sex with Nick though? lol! No, Ed, don't listen to me, I'm just trouble.)

    • Laura: I think this one was published when I was on vacation–I had it set to publish on a schedule, and I didn’t get a chance to announce it because of that.

      Ed may have been bluffing there–it is likely she’ll pine at the very least, but she’d never let him know it. Before she began her relationship with Sean, she worried about this very thing–that he’d leave her. She was still blindsided when it actually happened, especially under these particular circumstances. She’s tired of having pieces of her life on hold or unresolved because people leave or disappear.

      Yay for the trust! :) I am really excited about where all of this leads everyone.

      LOL, I don’t think you’re bad for hoping she has rebound sex with Nick–Nick is pretty awesome. We’ll have to see how things develop… ;)

      Thank you for reading and commenting!

    • Swiirl73: I’m glad you liked the chapter! I hope you like what comes after… Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment!

  13. Oh, Sean! *shakes head disapprovingly* Okay, so I guess I (sort of) understand his way of thinking, I mean, I get he’s afraid of making the same mistakes he did in the past, and everything. And yet… his reasoning is full of nonsense. You can’t go through life telling your girlfriend: “Hey, I love you. Let’s break up!” Come on, man!

    Anyway, I have the feeling there’s more than meets the eye in this whole situation. We only get to know Ed’s POV, after all, and Sean might be thinking all sorts of stuff we know nothing about…

    PS: And don’t worry, I’ll trust you. It was a great chapter :D.

    • Marsar: Like most of us, Sean isn’t always reasonable. He is allowing his fears to overcome his good sense in this case. I have the feeling that if he hadn’t known that Ed ever had a thing for Nick, he wouldn’t have felt quite so threatened.

      Thank you for reading and commenting!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 110 other followers